<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>we fall apart as it gets dark by brittany4824</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23346634">we fall apart as it gets dark</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/brittany4824/pseuds/brittany4824'>brittany4824</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Veronica Mars (TV), Veronica Mars - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Arranged Marriage, Because I've warned you, Epic you know, F/M, Happy Ending, I promise, Just some bloodshed and stuff, Logan Echolls as his snarky self but in a secret society, Logan and Veronica end up together always no matter what RT thinks, Nobody get mad at me for the angst, POV First Person, Secret Society, just a warning, mafia, slightly dark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 09:14:14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>22,386</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23346634</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/brittany4824/pseuds/brittany4824</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world where her every move has been decided for her since birth, Veronica find herself in an arranged marriage to a stranger. He is as cruel as he is mysterious. His amber eyes holds a secret, one that weaves them closer together than she could have ever imagined. In a world where everything is dark and everything is chaos, Veronica finds herself falling for her husband. The only problem? He doesn't love her back and he never will. Because his heart belongs to someone else. Her sister.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Logan Echolls/Lilly Kane, Logan Echolls/Veronica Mars</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>109</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>67</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. the beginning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>PROLOGUE</strong>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <strong>PRESENT</strong>
</p><p>
  <span>I had spent my whole life in my sister’s shadow. She was older, prettier, and fearless. I was the timid little girl who always looked up to her. But living in shadows was dangerous. Shadows were where monsters lived. It was only a matter of time before I was ensnared by their traps. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Closing my eyes, I focus on breathing. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>In out, in out, in out…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>I don’t know how much longer I have until I won’t breathe again. So I lay, appreciating the ability. Something I had always taken for granted until now. My breaths are shaky and shallow. I try to make them deeper— calmer, but it’s no use. My body has too much adrenaline coursing through it. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>In out, in out, in out…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>I wonder why it’s taking so long— my death. Shouldn’t I be gone by now? Is death considering passing me by? No, I knew it was coming. I just had to be patient. I begin to count, but my mind is racing and I can’t think clearly enough to get past the number three. So I focus on breathing. It’s the only thing that I can control in this moment. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>In out, in out, in out…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>I feel hot tears trailing down my face. I wish I wasn’t crying. I wanted to be strong— like my sister. But they continue to fall, dampening the pillow beneath me. I’m shaking. I’m sure it’s evident how scared I really am. I’m sure my skin has paled under his watch. But then again I’ve always had pale skin so maybe death wouldn’t notice I was completely terrified to greet him. I’d never appreciated my skin, but in some sick way I was happy I had pale skin now. The blood that would be splattered against it would be much more obvious than it ever would have been on someone else. Maybe they’ll think I’m beautiful like that. Dead with my crimson blood painting me. Maybe </span>
  <em>
    <span>he’ll </span>
  </em>
  <span>finally think I’m beautiful. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then I’m reminded that hot tears are not the only things I feel against my skin. The cold metal pressed to my head is hard to ignore— cold metal of the gun that the man in black holds to my forehead, steady and unwavering. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why hasn’t he pulled the trigger? Why am I not dead? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe he’s waiting for me to fight. But I can’t— won’t. I have to die. The monsters had found me; they had trapped me. I have to die for </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>. My sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Would she be sad? Would she be guilty? Surely she would figure out my death was for her. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>In out, in out, in… </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Before I can let out my last breath, the gun goes off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pain.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Blood mixed with hot tears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And finally… nothing but darkness. Darkness and the shadows I had never been able to crawl from.</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>FIVE YEARS EARLIER</strong>
</p><p>
  <span>Every girl dreams about her wedding day. Or at least, most girls do. Girls that live in pretty, yellow houses with white wooden fences. The kinds of girls that are kissed goodnight by their mothers and read bedtime stories by their fathers. Or maybe it was just the kinds of girls that were able to get lost in the fantasy of love told to us in movies and television and books. Girls like my sister, Lilly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She would whisper at night about her dreams while we pretended to sleep in our shared bedroom. The stories she told were masterfully woven with drama and mystery and action. She’d tell me some day a man, tall, dark and handsome, would sweep her off her feet and rescue her from her fate. She’d laugh as she’d reenact what he would tell her as he stole her from our bedroom. Solemnly, Lilly would tell me how he’d tragically die at the hands of our father in a bloody battle. Being a few years younger than her, and much more naive, I had listened to each word spoken as if they were absolute truth. Maybe if she believed it would happen to her, it could also happen to me?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But as I aged, I realized there was no man coming to rescue us. We were thoroughly and completely trapped within the dark and seedy world our great-great grandfathers had created for us. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Our father and mother were part of what we called The Castle. It was a secret society, much like a mafia, that the privileged people of California ran. But the hand of The Castle reached far beyond our small beach town of Neptune, California. Senators, congressmen, future presidents, actors, policemen, CEOs from across the country pledged their allegiance to The Castle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And there were rules. Rules that had to be followed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>From a young age, I had been told exactly my role I was to play within our world. I was part of the Chosen, a group of women bred for one purpose: marriage. I was a possession to be sold to the highest bidder. Our marriages in The Castle were strategic, often plotted before the birth of the Chosen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Women in The Castle were broken into two groups, the Chosen and the Delilahs. My sister? She fell into the latter category. She was used as a pawn, just as I would be when my father found a reason to marry me off. But unlike me, marriage was not in my sister’s future. She was a different kind of pawn. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A soldier.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A soldier dressed in gowns and lips painted red.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Delilahs were created for the sole purpose of manipulation. It wasn’t until I was much older that I realized that the manipulation came in the form of seduction. Delilahs were taught to be cunning.They were beautiful. They were intelligent. They were deadly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Castle planted these women in the lives of our enemies— police we wanted to blackmail, congressmen that weren’t willing to work with us. Whatever the case was, our women would find their weaknesses and exploit them in one form or another. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>One time my sister had come home from one of her missions with a black eye and cut lip. She’d crawled into her twin bed and under her pink quilted blanket. She didn’t move for an entire day. Finally, when she decided to speak, late one night, she whispered, “Veronica, consider yourself lucky. As a wife, you’ll at least be allowed to live.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I hadn’t known what to say to that, so I’d stayed quiet as I listened to her labored breaths as she attempted to fall back to sleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lucky. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Were any of us really lucky? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After that mission, Lilly had retreated within herself. Her normal bubbly exterior had been replaced with a stony and somber one.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her physical appearance changed with time as well. At eighteen she had begun her missions with long blonde hair which she often pulled into a high pony tale. Her clothes were still that of a young girl. Playful. Colorful. But she was twenty four now, and she had grown into a woman. A woman who wore dark makeup, dark clothes. Her hair left down and curled. A temptress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’d lost her youthful spirit. She was a complete stranger to me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But one night. One night changed our lives forever. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I’d been asleep when the soft snick of the door awoke me and I found my sister creeping into the room with something so foreign I’d forgotten it had ever existed. Her smile. This smile was full of life and even in the dark, I could see her eyes dancing with a happiness I didn’t think Lilly Kane was capable of having any longer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit,” she giggled as she found my wide eyes studying her. “I didn’t mean to wake you, V.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hadn’t called me by my childhood nickname in years. Hearing it on her lips had me sitting up in bed. What was going on?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I echoed my thoughts when I asked, “Are you drunk?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had only ever seen her drunk twice before. Each time she had seemed happier, but never like this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” she scoffed with a smile. She sat beside me on my bed, nudging me over so she could slip under the covers. “But I have a secret, a good one.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If I had known those words would change the course of our entire lives, I would have begged her to keep it to herself. I would have covered my ears and refused to hear what she had to say. But instead, I was high off of her infectious joy. I wanted to know her secret because for the first time in forever, she was my sister again. The one who had told me the marvelous stories of true love and heroes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is it?” I’d wondered aloud. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She gave me a small smirk before unleashing her information, “I met someone. The man who’s going to get me out of here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I thought I had heard her wrong. Surely, she wasn’t insinuating that she was going to run away. I wasn’t sure what they did to those of us who tried to leave The Castle, but there had been a few attempts. Each one had ended with the person being caught. They never were seen again after their infamous Castle “court” summonings. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Out of here?” I repeated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God, Veronica, it’s not an equation you have to solve. I met someone. We’re in love and he’s going to get me out of here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But where would you go?” I asked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anywhere. Everywhere. I don’t know. We’ll figure it out. But you can’t say a word.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I won’t,” I promised. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly smiled and pulled me in for a hug. She kissed the top of my head before sliding out of my bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Laying back down, realization seeped through me that my sister had found her hero she’d always dreamed about. Realization that she was planning on running away— leaving me here alone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly I had the need to know the name of the man that was going to take my sister away from me— the single good thing in my life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s his name?” I asked, my voice so low it barely registered to my own ears. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Lilly heard me, and as she tugged her nightgown over her head she let out a dreamy sigh before answering. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She jumped into her bed, clicking the lamp between our beds off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I stayed still, mulling his name over and over again my head. Moving my lips to form his name without sound, testing it out. Tasting it. Memorizing it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had the name of the man who was going to turn my world upside down. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Logan Echolls.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. going to the chapel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello everyone!!</p><p>I am super excited to be back with you all. I missed you marshmallows with every fiber of my being. YOU are why I do this. Without you and your support, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be brave enough to post these words. It's a vulnerable thing, to share with the world words that bleed from you as a writer. But when I see your reviews and your excitement, I can't help but be more than willing to share my little worlds with you. These characters, as you can see, are AU versions of the ones we love. Expect, as we get further in, to see the nuances of what makes them who they are. You'll see the snark and the sass and the overall wonderful and terrible qualities each character has. I hope you love this Logan and Veronica as much as I do. I hope you get them. <br/>I will warn you, this is a Veronica who hasn't had a best friend die. She hasn't experienced Shelley Pomroy's party. But I promise, our little yellow dress Veronica is going to emerge from this as our kick-butt Veronica we have come to love. It'll just happen in an unconventional, AU way. <br/>So with that said, here is the beginning. Here is where it'll all begin. Buckle up. It's gonna be a doozy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>CHAPTER ONE:</b>
</p><p>
  <span>TWO YEARS LATER— Present</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly and Logan had continued their affair without getting caught. I had never seen the man with my own eyes, but Lilly had been very generous when giving details about him and their time together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I stored the knowledge deep in my mind so that I could better understand my… </span>
  <em>
    <span>duty</span>
  </em>
  <span>… as a wife one day. I was too embarrassed to ask her to help me understand certain terms, but I figured some knowledge about what the other sex enjoyed in bed was better than none. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They met up whenever she was on missions. She’d sneak him into her hotel rooms and they’d spend romantic weekends away together— well, as romantic as they could possibly be when Lilly was seducing other men for work. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’d come home with a look in her eye that only I could decipher. It meant she had news. It meant she had hope. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hope was something I had been running short on as I neared my twenty second birthday. I knew my father, Jake Kane, had been planning something, and I had a feeling that something was a marriage. He would watch me carefully each time I entered a room he was residing within. It made my skin crawl, being watched like I was prey being watched by a hunter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My father was the president of The Castle which meant he had more power than any man in America— and perhaps the world. This meant my marriage would be the most strategic of them all. I was a prized possession in my father’s eyes. I was the best way for him to get ahead of whatever game The Castle was playing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>One day, as I was eating in my kitchen, my mother sat beside me. She was silent. Too silent. I tried to smile and playfully nudged her, but she turned to me without a smile. Her eyes wide and full of unshed tears. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Veronica,” she whispered hoarsely before standing and leaving me in the silence of our huge kitchen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I looked at the cereal I had been eating. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wasn’t hungry anymore. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Later that day my father called me into his office. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut the door,” he told me without looking up from his laptop. I did as he asked and quietly stepped closer to his large, oak desk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sit down,” he demanded, knowing I was waiting to be told what to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was always waiting to be told what to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I followed his instruction. My stomach was flipping and twisting with anxiety of what he needed to tell me. Because deep down I knew. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had been sold to the highest bidder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, after several minutes of ignoring me for his computer screen, the infamous Jake Kane lifted his eyes to mine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As you know, I’ve been searching for the best husband for you,” he began. I actually had just assumed that part, he had never explicitly told me anything about my future arranged marriage. I nodded my head like the obedient daughter he had raised which was rewarded with a small smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. “Well, I have found him. I think it’ll be a good fit. You’ll be happy and taken care of.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What he meant was that </span>
  <em>
    <span>he’d </span>
  </em>
  <span>be happy and </span>
  <em>
    <span>The Castle </span>
  </em>
  <span>would be taken care of, but I didn’t argue that point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ll meet him tomorrow at your wedding ceremony. As you know, it’s custom for The Chosen to go into their marriage with blind faith in The Castle. But I assure you, you will be content in your new life.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He continued on without realizing I had already tuned him out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was getting married </span>
  <em>
    <span>tomorrow</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Anxiety clawed its way up my throat in the form of bile that I swallowed down. I couldn’t break down in front of Jake Kane. My father wasn’t the kind of man who held his daughters if they cried. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wondered what kind of man I would be marrying? Was he kind? Did he crack jokes and laugh openly the way I had seen men on movies and my television screen? Or was he powerful and silently cruel like my father was? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Had I met him before?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Would he like me?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was an absurd thought. It didn’t matter if he liked me. He had agreed to marry me for some reason, most likely to further his own agenda in some way with The Castle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But as silly as those lines of thought were, I couldn’t help but wonder…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Would he find me attractive?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was petite while my sister was tall. I was pastels and smooth lines while she was loud and bold with jagged lines. Men found her attractive. And Logan Echolls had even fallen in love with her. As a Chosen one I was homeschooled and as a precaution, kept away from men. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Being a virgin bride was kind of a big deal for The Castle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly had told me it was a bunch of bullshit and misogynistic as hell. But I didn’t see </span>
  <em>
    <span>her </span>
  </em>
  <span>trying to break out of the mold they’d placed her in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So yes, I was a virgin. In fact, other than Lilly’s vivid details about her own sex life, I was relativly clueless when it came to sex and men. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And not in a cute way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had long blonde hair and never wore makeup. It wasn’t because Chosen couldn’t wear makeup. A lot of us did, but I never liked the stuff. It reminded me of my sister whenever she left for a mission. Her face was painted on like a doll. Lifeless and cold. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I preferred my own skin. My own colors, or lack thereof. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I usually wore jeans with a a t shirt, but occasionally donned a sundress when I was feeling fancy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I liked photography, and was even granted permission to roam our vast property to take pictures with my camera. It was mostly of nature, but every once in a while, I would find maids shuffling between our house and the other buildings that were located on our land. I would quickly snap shots of them. I liked to observe people when given the chance. The way they walked. The way they carried themselves. Sometimes I would find two people deep in conversation. I would take their photo without knowing. It was thrilling. Freezing time with my camera without them ever knowing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Other than photography, my life was created by those around me. My mother chose my hobbies while my father dictated the rest of our lives. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wasn’t entirely sure, aside from my photos, what I really liked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Who I really was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My father’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “You can go now,” he told me with his stern voice, void of even an ounce of love. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I nodded, stood, and left him to his dark world. </span>
</p><p>-*-</p><p>
  <span>Lilly was away on a mission. I wanted... no... I </span>
  <em>
    <span>needed </span>
  </em>
  <span>her. She would know how to ease my racing mind. My life was changing. In twenty four hours I would be married to a complete stranger, and I didn’t know the first thing about being a wife. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had watched my submissive mother walk our halls like a ghost, but I didn’t want to be like her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wanted to be like Lilly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hopeful. Passionate, Full of a life I couldn’t fully understand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That night I sat on my bed, facing her empty one. I tried to imagine what she would say if she were here. Would she be happy for me? Or would she be angry that I was escaping from our home while she was forced to continue her life here? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t really conjure any sort of conversation between me and my invisible sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was the first time in my life I had to rely on myself to be brave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica,” I whispered in the dark, my voice floating through the air reaching no ears but my own. I cleared my throat and tried again. “Veronica, you are strong.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My throat tightened as I let the emotions I had been trying to hide emerged from the shadows. Tears threatened to fall, but I shook them away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are going to get through this,” I promised myself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I just wasn’t sure if I believed that determined voice echoing through my otherwise quiet room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span> -*-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every girl dreams about her wedding day. Or at least, most girls do. I had never really given much thought to what my wedding would look like. Perhaps it was a defense mechanism. I blocked all thoughts of weddings from my mind because I knew mine was completely out of my control. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I guess I knew I would wear a white dress. I knew it would probably take place within a church.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But I never, in my wildest dreams, would have thought it would look the way it did. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wore a long, white gown that was covered in lace. My veil covered my face and dragged long past the short train of my dress. It was heavy, and I found myself wishing I could ditch it. A headache had begun at the base of my neck and had slowly crept its way up through the back of my head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My father held my arm, one hand resting upon it in a tight grip as though he believed I was going to run. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wouldn’t dare. I didn’t know what waited for me if I chose to go that route.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>My makeup had been done professionally. My mother had fussed over me as if this were a real wedding and I was a blushing bride. I let her live in her fantasy. She was fragile, and I knew she could break at any moment if I wasn’t careful, </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment the double door of the church’s auditorium opened, I was stunned by the amount of people who were attending. Faces that were familiar and others that weren’t. Hundreds of people lined the pews. All eyes on me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My eyes? They were set on the tall man who waited for me at the end of the aisle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>From a first glance, he was evidently handsome. His shoulders were broad and stretched the fitted sport coat across them. His hair was cut short in a military style. His smile took my breath away. It spread wide as I stepped closer. His eyes told me he had been waiting for this moment for a while. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had never seen him in my life and I wondered why he had chosen me. Why he’d made an agreement with my father. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But I almost sagged with relief because his smile meant he was kind— something I had worried about all night and into the early morning. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Remember,” my father said under his breath, his smile still intact. It was eery how easy it was for him to speak while looking as if he were a beaming father of the bride to the crowd. “Don’t speak until you say ‘I do.’ It’s vital that you remember our tradition.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I nodded. He didn’t need to worry, I was unable to speak anyway. My nerves had their firm grip on my throat. I was worried I wouldn’t even be able to utter, “I do” when the time came. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>We finally made it to the altar. My father kef My groom was already standing in his place. The pastor between us. I faced him. He mouthed something to me, but I couldn’t quite read it through my thick veil. He winked before turning his attention to the pastor who had begun the ceremony. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The pastor spoke about love, as if this was a marriage based on the foundation of that foreign concept. Finally he began the vows. His attention was first on my groom. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you take this woman as your wife, through the dark, through the light. Do you promise your life to her, through death, through life?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The man across from me licked his lips. It was then that I realized he was nervous too. Something about that was comforting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” he said after turning his eyes in my direction. My breath caught. He meant it. To him, I wasn’t just a prize that he had been bought. I couldn’t dwell on that for too long because the pastor then repeated the words to me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” I managed to squeak out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” the pastor smiled. “My son, meet your wife for the first time as your partner henceforth.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The pastor pulled the veil from my face, uncovering my wide eyes and parted lips that had been painted crimson for the occasion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I slowly turned my attention from the wrinkled face of the pastor to my new husband. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I expected to find his beautiful smile, but instead was met with a look of shock that quickly turned to volatile anger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But my new husband didn’t say a word. He didn’t scream like I half-expected him to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was so confused by his reaction, the cheers from the crowd had been completely deadened. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When we stepped together, he pulled me close to his side and whispered into my ear, “What the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck </span>
  </em>
  <span>is going on.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t answer him because I probably knew less than he did. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>We waited for music to begin before walking back down the aisle, past the cheers and congratulations. I was dragged by my arm to a room somewhere down the hall. When the door slammed shut, I winced. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My husband was not the man I had hoped he would be. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This man? He wasn’t the one smiling at me from across the room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was dark. He was terrifying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he turned to find me slowly backing into the room away from him, his lips curled into a smirk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can’t run away from me,” he warned me. “Who are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Who was I? Did he not set up this entire marriage with my father? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica,” I told him, attempting to keep my own emotions from showing themselves. I was scared, I was confused, but more than anything I was angry. Who was this man? How dare he act as if I had somehow personally offended him by marrying him? I was the one without the choice. I was the one without the voice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica…?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was waiting for my last name, I realized. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kane,” I supplied. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His brows knit together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not possible that you’re Jake Kane’s daughter.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That had my brows following his as I tried to understand what this confusion was about. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But I am,” I argued. “Veronica </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kane</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Under his breath he muttered something about not being told ‘she had a sister.’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stood taller, the anger in his face had been washed away and replaced with a stony look of indifference. My blood chilled as he made his way to me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where’s Lilly?” he asked me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly? Why did he want to know about my sister? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But just as I was about to ask him why he cared about my sister’s whereabouts, I was faced with a thought that had my stomach sinking and my mouth drying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s your name?” I asked him, ignoring his question about my sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, there was no possible way, He couldn’t be </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Logan,” he told me. “Logan Echolls.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The shock must have been evident on my face because he stared at me, his brows drawn together and his lips drew into a thin line. He looked as if he were confused by my reaction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can’t be Logan,” I said aloud. I wasn’t sure if I was talking to him or to myself, but either way I couldn’t accept that the man I had just married was Logan Echolls. </span>
  <em>
    <span>The </span>
  </em>
  <span>Logan Echolls. The man that was supposed to rescue my sister from her dark world. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could say the same about you. You can’t be Jake Kane’s daughter,” he countered. “So who the hell are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Indignation rose in my chest that he didn’t believe me. It was mixed with a feeling of hurt that Lilly had never mentioned me to her lover. Regardless, I was done arguing that I was Jake Kane’s daughter when clearly I was telling the truth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily I didn’t have to defend myself, because at that moment the door was thrown open and my father, who looked pissed off, stepped inside. He rushed toward Logan with his finger waving in Logan’s direction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you hurt her?” my father yelled at Logan. My husband rolled his eyes and let out a rough laugh. My father turned to me and said in a softer tone, “Did he hurt you, Veronica?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N.. No. We were just talking,” I stammered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your </span>
  <em>
    <span>daughter </span>
  </em>
  <span>was just explaining to me exactly how it was she ended up being my wife,” Logan spat. The way he said ‘daughter’ made it obvious that he still didn’t believe my heritage. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My </span>
  <em>
    <span>daughter </span>
  </em>
  <span>was doing as she was told,” Jake returned hotly. The two men stared each other down before my father finally backed down. “I know you expected Lilly to be behind that veil. But if you had even tried for a moment to look past your own selfish tendencies, Mr. Echolls, you would have realized Lilly is not able to marry you. Nor will I ever allow her to divulge in a silly school-girl fantasy in which you’re a hero. She is a Delilah, Logan. You know she can’t marry.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yet you told me I would be able to marry—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My daughter,” Jake cut Logan off. “And I did,” he told him, waving his hand in my direction. “There she is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Here I was, indeed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I carefully moved my eyes to Logan. He was fuming. The tension in the air was thick and tangible. It slid across my skin and burned. I wanted to run away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You knew,” Logan told my father, his voice low and venomous, “I meant Lilly.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And as I said before, you should have looked past your own desires to realize that I had more than one daughter.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You son of a bitch. You knew what I meant!” Logan yelled. I shrunk back, wishing I could disappear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My father smiled, it was wide like a Cheshire cat. The chuckle that erupted made my skin crawl. I had always known my father was not a good man, but his nonchalance toward this entire situation confirmed my worst fear: he truly did not love me or my sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you really think Lilly loved you?” Jake laughed. Logan didn’t allow my father to bait him, ignoring his question so Jake continued. “You were her mission. Get close to you. Find your weakness. We just never imagined your weakness would be her.” He paused and stepped closer to Logan. My new husband was staring at the wall behind me, mouth clamped shut. His jaw twitched in anger. “You were the fool,” Jake whispered, “who fell for a pretty face.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was when all hell broke loose. Logan’s fist collided with my father’s face with a stomach-dropping crunch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lilly loves me!” he screamed at my father as his blows continued to land on my father’s face. I should have been terrified. I should have jumped to my father’s defense, but instead I was frozen in place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A sick twisted thought formed in my head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t want to stop Logan.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She loves me!” Logan repeated, his voice cracking. He shoved my father down into the floor of the church, pushing himself up to his feet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes met mine, chest heaving from the deep breaths he was taking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Get your shit, Veronica, we’re leaving.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t want to tell him that I didn’t have anything to take with me, so I just followed him out the door, leaving my bleeding father on the ground. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a man outside of the room when we emerged, and Logan spoke to him in a quiet voice before taking my arm and pulling me along with him down the empty hallway. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are we just leaving him there?” I asked, knowing I shouldn’t show any kind of remorse for the fact that my father had been beaten to a bloody pulp. I expected Logan to answer me, but instead he ignored my question. So I tried again, “Where are we going? I don’t have any—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stopped abruptly, causing me to run into the hard back of his body. He twisted to face me and spoke low, “I need you to shut up, Veronica.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Though I had never been high on my father’s list of things he cared about, I had never been spoken to in such a disrespectful way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Excuse me?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned and began to pull me toward the door once again ignoring me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When we reached a black car outside, a man stepped from the driver’s seat and pulled the back door open for us. Logan waited for me to slide in before he followed suit, the door closing behind him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The car was a large SUV and the back seats faced each other. He sat on one side and I on the other. His attention was on the window as the car rolled away from the church and away from the nightmare that had just ensued. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I took that time to study him. He was young, perhaps even my age, which surprised me because I had always pictured Lilly’s Logan as older than her. He rested a finger to his lips and I knew he was deep in thought. I could feel his emotions radiating off of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then again, how would </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>feel if I was betrayed in the way he had been?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>My father had told him that Lilly had just used him, but I knew that wasn’t the truth. I had seen firsthand the way he had made her feel these past years. I had watched her come back to life. Her secrets had filled our nights as she and I giggled about her secret love. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I decided Logan should know my father had been lying so I found my courage and said, “Jake was lying to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan didn’t move from his position. He didn’t even act as if he’d heard me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He said you were Lilly’s mission. But I know that’s not true,” I tried again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time he breathed a heavy and labored sigh before shifting his gaze in my direction— waiting for me to continue. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My sister is my best friend— my only friend. She told me everything. About how you met, how you fell in love. She even told me about your plans to run away…” I paused when I saw his jaw clench at that revelation. When he didn’t respond I continued, “She was so happy because of you. I know Jake was lying.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wasn’t sure if my confession was worth anything considering he was still married to the wrong sister, but I hoped it brought him some peace regardless. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He blinked at me. Once, twice, three times. Licking his lips, his eyes roamed my face before falling lower and assessing me in one slow move. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You look nothing alike,” he finally said. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Did he still not believe that I was Jake’s daughter? I didn’t know how to convince him otherwise, so I stayed silent. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you know that you were marrying your sister’s great love?” he asked me in a mocking tone. “Did you know that you were getting the escape route she had wanted so desperately?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” I gasped. I couldn’t believe he would think I would ever do that to my sister. Then again he knew absolutely nothing about me. Could I really blame him for the assumption?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where is Lilly? I tried contacting her yesterday and she never responded. I just assumed that it was because she was busy with wedding preparation. Clearly I was wrong.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“On a mission.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course she is,” Logan muttered. He returned to his previous position of looking out the window, ignoring me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I closed my eyes and rested my head against the seat. Today had been draining. My heart ached at the memory of the brief moment that I had thought this marriage could work. My heart hurt for the smile he had given me as I walked down the aisle toward him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>See, hope was a dangerous thing. It could keep a person sane. It could keep someone alive. But the moment a person loses hope, it is worse than any death. The emptiness that hope leaves behind is all consuming. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His smile hadn’t been for me. It had been for Lilly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had gone from one home that didn’t want me to another. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. Not only was I not married for love, but I wasn’t even married as a prize. I wasn’t a rose, but instead a thorn that had brought pain to another man’s life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry,” I murmured, knowing nothing I could say would make our situation better. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My thoughts turned to my sister. I wondered where she was. I wondered if she had any idea what had transpired today. My sister’s line of work was dangerous. Sometimes she would go silent for months at a time as she assimilated herself into another man’s life. She would spend weeks worming her way into his schedule and life in order to retrieve information about him and his activities or long enough to blackmail him. The men she came in contact with often were bad men. They wouldn’t hesitate to eliminate her if they ever found out what her true motives were. Whenever she was gone, she was cut off from any communication in order to protect her location and her mission. I spent every day worrying about her until I could see her face and count her fingers and toes to make sure she came back home in one piece. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her light at the end of the tunnel had been Logan, and I had unintentionally taken that from her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had so many questions for Logan, but was too scared to voice them. I knew he was angry and I wasn’t even sure if he’d respond to me if I were to try to ask him anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why had he gone to my father to marry Lilly? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why hadn’t Lilly ever discussed my existence with Logan?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the one question that had been plaguing me since we had left the church was, what was he going to do with me now that he had me?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was sure he had signed some sort of contract with my father. He had to have paid my father for my hand in marriage in some form. Was getting rid of me worth losing whatever it had been he had paid with? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I let the questions go unasked and we spent the rest of the drive in a deafening silence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the car finally came to a stop, I forced myself to not look out the window. I wanted to see where I was going to be living now that I was a married woman, but I didn’t want Logan to have the satisfaction over the fact that I was even interested in anything pertaining to him. So I kept my eyes forward, waiting for the driver to open the door for us like he had when we’d first gotten in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I heard the crunch of gravel beneath shoes, and then the door swung open. The frigid air of winter hit my face sending goosebumps to dance across my bare arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan shuffled out of the SUV, not sparing a single glance in my direction. He didn’t care if I followed or not, of that much I was sure. So without being prompted, I followed his lead. With his back to me, I was able to fully take in my surroundings. The SUV had stopped in a circular driveway in front of, what I assumed to be, Logan’s house. No, that wasn’t the right word for this massive place. It looked like a castle. Ivy crept along the sides of the stony exterior. Large, gray steps led to the red double doors. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before we reached the doors, however, a woman opened them— her smile wide and full of joy that neither Logan or I could share. It was evident that she had work done, her pout full and skin wrinkle free. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Logan, honey!” she exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air, one holding a martini glass. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom,” was Logan’s reply. His voice sounded tight and annoyed. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Mom</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was Logan’s mother. I took a second to look at her. Did she live here? Was she happy to have a new girl around? Was she kind? Had she been a good mom? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looked so completely opposite of my own mother who never wore makeup and wore her hair down and unstyled. While Logan’s mother wore a shirt that was form fitting, highlighting her chest, my mother wore drab and loose clothing. In The Castle, wives were not meant to stand out. We didn’t want attention brought to ourselves. My clothes had been handpicked by my parents. They were void of color and shape. I hadn’t ever minded the clothes. I wore things for comfort, not giving much thought to my appearance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly had once rolled her eyes at my closet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, wha-, none of this reflects your personality at all,” she had said as she rifled through my things. “Why, why do you even have this? You are </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>a yellow cotton dress.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wanted to argue that I felt as though I really was a yellow dress kind of person. But instead I had rolled my eyes playfully, “So what am I then?” I had pressed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her words echoed deep within my soul, “You're red satin.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly had been wrong. I wasn’t anything like red satin. The woman who was standing in front of me was the kind of person I would describe as red satin. I watched as she air kissed Logan’s cheeks and changed my mind. Maybe she wasn’t red satin. Leather and sequins was maybe the better material to describe the buoyant woman standing in front of us. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I bit back a smile, not wanting to find any kind of humor or happiness in my situation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan nodded at his mom and continued his path inside his castle. I followed like the good girl I had been taught to be, even though I had a moment where I imagined turning and running. Maybe I could get away? Maybe Logan wouldn’t even try to stop me?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But I pushed thoughts of escape out of my mind as I passed Logan’s mom. Her sickly sweet perfume attacked me the moment I was near her. She eyed me with a smile still plastered on her face, but her eyes narrowed as if she were assessing me. I returned a timid smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aren’t you going to introduce us?” his mother demanded of her son. Logan’s stopped in his tracks and his body tensed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No need,” he replied over his shoulder. Not once did he turn around to acknowledge us the way any polite human would. “I’ll be returning it the first chance I get.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had referred to me as an it. My mouth dropped open in shock, hatred bubbled through my veins in a way I had never experienced in my twenty two years of living. His mother must have been equally as shocked at her son’s rudeness because she pretended as if she hadn’t heard him, turning to me looking a little shaken. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m Lynne, sweetie,” she offered. Her hand reached in my direction and I took it, my hand was noticeably shaking. Whether it was from the fury that had settled within my whole being or because I was nervous, I wasn’t sure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica,” I told her weakly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This seemed to confuse Lynne. Her brows tried to furrow, though the Botox that was clearly in her forehead didn’t allow for the motion to be as prominent. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica?” she asked me carefully. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” I told her. I knew what was happening, she thought Lilly Kane was going to be joining their family. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wasn’t Lilly Kane. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was Veronica. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t understand who this stranger standing in front of her was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was understandable, her confusion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But deep inside I heard a whisper that echoed throughout my entire being. It was a thought that had occasionally crept inside my head when I was laying alone in my dark room. It was a thought I had carefully hidden and ignored for my entire life. But standing here as a stranger to this new world, I couldn’t ignore it no matter how hard I tried. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With every shaky breath I took and every beat of my racing heart, I heard it— thundering and demanding my attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You don’t even know who Veronica is, </span>
  </em>
  <span>it mocked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And for the first time in my entire life… </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I agreed. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. trying red satin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, just another warning: This fic is currently living without a beta. Which can sometimes be like a a child without a babysitter. In other words, if you see any disastrous mistakes, blame the mom. She should have been paying better attention.<br/>I am mom.<br/>Just in case you needed clarification.<br/>Okay, it's too late. I need to sleep.<br/>Thanks for joining me for chapter two (three)!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>-Veronica-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The house was just as glamorous on the inside as it was out. People scurried around us as Logan continued his journey deeper within the home. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry,” Lynne was explaining behind us, “I thought you would be here later. We planned to have guests arrive at eight… and well…” her voice drifted before continuing, “It’s only six.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry about it, ma. Gives us time to freshen up,” Logan chuckled darkly. He twisted his head slightly to address me, “Right, </span>
  <em>
    <span>wife</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t respond. The anger I felt toward him was already at my maximum capacity. I didn’t understand how a man could be so cruel when I clearly had no choice in marrying him. He could be angry that I wasn’t Lilly. Heck, I understood </span>
  <em>
    <span>why </span>
  </em>
  <span>he would be angry. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>was angry for him, but his displaced aggression was wearing thin on my usual calm demeanor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh!” Lynne chirped, “That’s true.” She tapped my shoulder and I slowed my pace to fall back beside her. “Veronica,” the way she said my name was slow as if she were saying something in a foreign language, “Is Lilly your middle name?” she asked me, her voice quiet so Logan couldn’t hear. I sighed and shook my head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lilly is my sister,” I informed her. But before we could delve too deep into the woeful story of a poor bride and manipulated groom, Logan groaned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mother. Don’t you need to make sure that the party’s planning is going accordingly? Wouldn’t want your guests drinking the four hundred dollar champagne instead of the 800 dollar Dom.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Though I  had limited experience with people, I did have a lot of experience with sarcasm thanks to Lilly. The sarcasm laced in Logan’s tone was not lost to me. His mother, however, seemed to miss it completely. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, sweetie,” she gushed, “You’re absolutely right! Just make sure you two lovebirds are downstairs by the time the guests arrive!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that the small woman hurried off in the same direction the maids and workers were headed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan continued his path toward the double staircase at the end of the foyer. Trying to focus on anything but the man in front of me, I eyed the paintings on the walls as we climbed the stairs. I wondered if any of them were famous paintings or if they had been specially made for the house. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The interior of the house was bathed in darkness. Everything seemed to be gray or black, and it seemed fitting for the man I had found Logan to be so far. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time we made our way to a closed door upstairs and down a long hallway, I  was out of breath, but I tried not to show it. He wouldn’t have the satisfaction of seeing me as weak in any way. My pride was already hanging by a thread as it were. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan pushed the door open and immediately beelined for another door within the room. When he flicked the light on, I realized it was a closet he had entered. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Great</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I thought, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’ll be really familiar with the backside of my husband’s head at this rate. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He had yet to really speak to me since the conversation we had at the church. I had questions and I know he probably had more questions too. I wanted to tear my dress off, put on pajamas, and sit down to </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually </span>
  </em>
  <span>talk to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe we could work this out somehow? Maybe he could send me back?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But as soon as that thought crossed my mind, I shuddered. I couldn’t be sent back. Not if I didn’t want to be exiled. During one of my many Chosen lessons, we had been told that if Chosen women were found to be less than satisfactory by their husbands, they would be exiled. They never really went into detail about what being exiled looked like, but I didn’t want to find out. I imagined it was a lot like what happened to the men and women who were found to be traitors and sent off, never to be seen again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were freaking murdered. Just to clarify. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I may have been naive, but I wasn’t stupid. I knew that The Castle couldn’t have any loose ends running around. Loose ends caused noise. Noise caused trouble. Trouble was something The Castle did not stand for, even if you were the president’s daughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Logan decided to discard me, which he very well could do and had even implied he would do, I didn’t know what would happen to me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. I couldn’t let him send me back. I had to try to convince him to let me stay. He didn’t have to love me. He didn’t even have to </span>
  <em>
    <span>like </span>
  </em>
  <span>me. I could help around the house for all I cared, as long as he didn’t send me back like damaged goods. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You going to stay in that dress all night or are you going to change?” Logan’s muffled voice called from the closet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t have anything with me,” I informed him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His head popped through the doorway and he nodded toward the inside of the closet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I ventured closer after closing the room’s door behind me. I noted warily that I was trapped inside that room with a man that I didn’t know who was wanting me to take my clothes off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But that wasn’t true, was it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>know him, whether he realized it or not. Clearly Lilly had skimped on the details of her family life to her lover, but in regard to him, she had been very generous while telling me all about her Logan Echolls. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I knew his favorite food was Mexican. I knew he was allergic to shellfish. I knew that he sung in the shower (something Lilly had giggled about before going into detail about how you have shower sex— something I had burned into my memory). Which led me to a weird, intimate fact about the situation we were in. I knew the ways he liked to have sex. My face burned with embarrassment over that fact as I drew closer to the closet. It was the only light on in the room, and it left a glow on the ground that I followed until I finally came face-to-face with my shirtless husband. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was now in a dark pair of jeans, but his lack of shirt was all I could focus on. He was extremely fit. His muscles flexed as he reached for something. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica,” his voice reminded me that he would know that I was openly staring at his chest… and yes, as I let my eyes drift lower, I was definitely looking at his six pack. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sue me. I had been deprived of male companionship my entire life. Even a nun would have looked at this beautiful, shirtless man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes?” I squeaked. I hated that I was so affected by him. I wanted to stomp my feet and let him know that I did not like him and I would not stand for his aggression. But instead I squeaked out a yes which led to another wave of embarrassment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Here,” he grumbled, thrusting a box into my hands. I held it up for inspection, trying to figure out what it was. “Just open it,” he growled. He pulled away from me and ventured further into the closet. I took the time to really take in the massive closet we were in. It was the size of a small room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had grown up in a large house— a mansion, some would say— but my father and mother were practical. They didn’t divulge in things like walk in closets and huge wardrobes. We had what we needed and nothing more. They were under the belief that less was more and to be flashy was a sign of “new money.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wondered if the Echolls were “new money.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tore a henley off of a hanger and hastily pulled it over his head. I watched as he dressed himself with a fascination that I didn’t want to admit I had. But I knew he would be more angry with me than he already was if I didn’t open the box I held, so I pulled the lid off to reveal a satiny red material. I grasped the fabric in my hand and let the box fall away. When the fabric unfolded, I realized it was a dress. A dress that I knew, from looking at it, would leave very little to the imagination. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I— Do I….” I sputtered looking at the dress in horror. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can either stay in that wedding dress or put that thing on,” he told me in a clipped voice. His amber eyes met mine. They held a fury that made me shiver. “Your call.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will it fit?” I asked shyly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was made for Lilly,” he shrugged. “I’m not good at sizing people up, but surely you should know if you can fit into your sister’s clothing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilly and I weren’t extremely far off from each other when it came to sizes. But where I was flat chested, she had been gifted with, what she called, “a nice pair of tits.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I eyed the fabric suspiciously. It didn’t hurt to try it on. At the very most it wouldn’t fit and I’d have to put the wedding dress back on. Without the horrible veil weighing me down, the white dress wasn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>bad. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where should I try it on?” I asked, giving in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He laughed. It wasn’t a dark chuckle or a sarcastic grunt like he’d been giving me since I’d met him. This was a real laugh. It made my eyes go wide, but I watched his smile quickly dissolve into a thin line— though not quite a frown. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>our closet… You can get dressed here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Our closet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something about that made my stomach churn. It felt wrong. Putting on Lilly’s dress in what Logan referred to as “our closet.” But we were married. There was nothing more to it.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can you turn around?” I asked him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He quirked an eyebrow and smirked. “Can I not enjoy watching my wife get undressed?” he inquired. I didn’t like the way his eyes trailed down my body, but it was the way his voice was tinged with disgust that really had me feeling uncomfortable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Was it disgust with the situation or with me? I wondered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you wish to watch your wife, you have the right to do so,” I told him. As angry as I was about how I was being treated there was one thing that remained true. He was my husband and I was to obey him like I was taught to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan tilted his head slightly to the right as he studied me. After a small pause he questioned, “Do I?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What other answer was there to give? I was once my father’s property, now I was his. If he wanted to watch me undress, I couldn’t stop him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Weird,” he whispered. His voice was low and gravelly. It sent a chill down my spine. “I thought women had the right to say no.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not me,” I whispered back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I don’t know if he heard me or not because he shouldered past me, leaving me alone in his ridiculous closet surrounded by his expensive clothes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I eyed the dress in my hands again, releasing a shaky breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What did he mean? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Women had the right to say no</span>
  </em>
  <span>? In the world I had been brought up in, women never had a chance to say no because they rarely had a voice at all. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wondered if his weird ideas were what drew my sister to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Did he let her say no? Did he let her be her own person? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But I already knew the answer to those questions. Of course he had. She was full of the life he breathed into her whenever she came home after seeing him. Then she had breathed a little bit of that life into me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Little did Logan know he hadn’t been keeping one woman alive, but two. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>One through his love. The other through the hope that he represented. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But now that I had met my hope in person, I wondered if it had all been built on a lie. Surely this Logan couldn’t be the same man Lilly had described night after night. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This man was cold. He was cruel. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t my hope. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was my monster.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-Logan-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I paced the room, trying to cool my anger before the doe of a woman who was currently in my closet got dressed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jake Kane had double crossed me. I should have known better than to trust him. I knew what kind of man he was, yet somehow I had believed he would actually allow me to marry his daughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, his </span>
  <em>
    <span>other </span>
  </em>
  <span>daughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck!” I cursed. My outburst echoed through the room, and I was sure that Veronica had heard it. But fuck it. I didn’t care. She was just as much of a problem as her father was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Had she known what she was signing up for? She had seemed clueless when I questioned her at the church. The odds were more stacked toward the fact that she had just blindly followed her father down the aisle without a single thought. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Chosen, in my personal experience, were vapid wastes of spaces. I was positive </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>blonde girl was no exception to the rule. She had spent the entire car ride silent. Her wide eyes were blank of emotion whenever I found enough courage to look at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had no use for her. I didn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>need </span>
  </em>
  <span>a wife. I had wanted one. I had agreed to Jake’s terms solely because I thought I was getting Lilly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But all bets were off. If Jake Kane thought he could fuck me over like this, he was dead wrong. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dead being the operative word. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t care that he was The Castles president. All rulers must come to their end at some point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the plan, the plan that involved marrying Lilly, had blown up in my face. She was a key to ensuring the plan went accordingly. That Jake would end dead and The Castle would be destroyed from the inside out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t know Veronica. I couldn’t trust her with my plan— not like I had been able to with Lilly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With the thought of Lilly, my heart ached in a way that I hadn’t known possible. Did she know that her family had betrayed her? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And what mission was she on? Why hadn’t she told me about it? If she had just told me she was leaving, I would have been able to realize Jake’s plan before I ever was forced into a marriage to Lilly’s sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something was off. I could feel it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was anxious to hear from Lilly, and I had texted and called her burner phone that I had supplied to her years ago multiple times. But I hadn’t heard a single word from her. The phone was on, which was a good sign, but I wondered what was keeping her so long. She never took this long to get back to me. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Unless she’s with another man longer than usual…</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t want to think about her sleeping with another man, though I knew she did it often. She never explicitly told me anything about her missions, but I would be a fool to believe she was celibate during the missions. That was, in fact, the entire point of the Delilahs. Seduce, manipulate, kill. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A shadow fell across the floor so I stopped my pacing and glanced in the direction of the closet where Veronica stood in the red dress meant for Lilly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Veronica wasn’t ugly— I wasn’t blind. But she wasn’t sexy like her sister. She was soft and in that moment, the red dress seemed to swallow her whole. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You look nice,” I ground out, remembering the manners my mother had taught me. I didn’t want to be nice, but by the look on Veronica’s face, if I was much more cold she would probably have a mental breakdown. She looked like she was terrified, and I couldn’t fully blame her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was not a nice man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I barely heard her reply when she responded with a “thank you” and I didn’t have time to baby my… </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I refused to call her that. She was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>my wife. Not if I had anything to say about it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s get downstairs. My parents will be waiting for us to make an appearance.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” she responded, much louder than she had before, “I thought we had two hours…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you really expect us to hang out in my room, Veronica?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She flinched at my raised voice so I toned it down when I asked, “What exactly could we do to kill time up here?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her face flushed and I wondered if her mind had gone to the dirty place mine had. Which pissed me off further. I didn’t want to think about any woman other than Lilly in that way. But the asshole in me couldn’t help but like making her feel uncomfortable so I added, “Unless you want me to deflower you now…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” she shouted before repeating herself in a quieter, but firm voice, “No. That wasn’t what… I mean, if you wanted to… but I…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I rolled my eyes at her obvious lack of self-respect and confidence. She was exactly like all the other Chosen women I had met in my lifetime. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vapid. Mindless. Robots. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t have all night to figure out what your fragment sentences mean, so if you could get to your point…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right,” she breathed, though I think she was primarily addressing herself. She finally raised her eyes to meet mine when she calmly and firmly stated, “We need to talk about what all of this means.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All of what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The marriage. Lilly. All of this. We need to talk about it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, shit. I guess she did have a little more fire in her than I had originally thought, but I didn’t want to give her any credit quite so early into the conversation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By all means,” I sighed, “Sit.” I motioned to the couch that she was standing near, and she quickly made her way to sitting. I followed suit by sitting in a lounge chair across from her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Speak,” I told her. I hated that I sounded like some asshole speaking to an untrained dog. It was wrong, I knew it was wrong, but I was so angry I couldn’t find it in myself to actually give a shit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“First,” she stated, her fair brows furrowing, “Don’t speak to me like that. I deserve your respect. I’ve done nothing to lose it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was wrong. I had lost respect for her the moment I realized she had just followed daddy’s orders of marrying a complete stranger. She was not someone who deserved respect when she didn’t even respect herself enough to make her own choices. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>But doesn’t Lilly do the same?</span>
  </em>
  <span> a traitorous voice demanded somewhere deep inside of my head. I promptly told him to shut the fuck up, because I wasn’t nearly drunk enough to unpackage that load of shit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t respond to Veronica’s request for respect, so she continued with her little speech she had undoubtedly practiced in the closet while she was getting dressed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Second, I need to clear something up. I did </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>know who I was marrying, I swear to God, Logan. I didn’t know it was you. I would have never done that to my sister.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She at least sounded genuine. And I realized that I believed her. I didn’t think she had done this to be conniving like I had originally thought when we were at the church. She was just another little robot of The Castle who’d been a good little girl and done what daddy had told her to do. I wasn’t sure which was worse. I bit my tongue to keep from telling her exactly that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When I didn’t respond, once again, she took a deeper breath and continued, “I know you don’t want to be married to me—” I couldn’t help the snort that left me and she paused. She bit her lip and the color on her cheeks deepened. I’d offended her, but I didn’t care. “Uh…” she faltered. When she spoke again she sounded less confident than she had been before and I knew it was my fault. “I know you said you wanted to get rid of me…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Get rid of her? She sounded as if she thought of herself as an item. Something easily disposed of. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then again, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>called her “it” downstairs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oops. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“... but if you send me back,” her voice started to sound slightly frantic, but she recollected herself and continued, “If you send me back… I don’t know what will happen to me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That caught my interest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just mean… Chosen who are sent back, are never seen again.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I could read between the lines. They fucking killed them. Just like The Castle did to anyone who was a slight nuisance to their existence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm, sounds like you must have a plan then?” I asked her. She froze and looked at me with an expression I couldn’t read. She almost seemed shocked, but I wasn’t sure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Would you send me back? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Will </span>
  </em>
  <span>you send me back?” she demanded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe,” I shrugged.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She gave me that look again, and I realized she was surprised by my flippant attitude toward her fate. But honestly, I didn’t understand how she could possibly be shocked. I didn’t know her. I didn’t owe her anything. If her father and her little secret society wanted to kill her, that was their problem, not mine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could stay here,” she suggested hopefully. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How would that benefit me in any way?” I asked, genuinely interested in what she thought she had to offer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could work here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Work here?” I repeated, my voice sounded as unresponsive to the idea as I felt. “I have plenty of staff. I don’t need to add someone who hasn’t lifted a finger their entire life.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The pink shade on her pale cheeks turned red. The flush began to trail down her neck and…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But I lifted my eyes before they could really glance at her breasts. From what I could tell they were small and unsatisfying anyway. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know I don’t have many skills…” she told me slowly, “But I swear I won’t get in your way. I could learn… I learn quickly… Oh!” she clasped her hands together and her eyes lit up. “I’m an excellent photographer!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She said that as if it were helpful in any way. What would I do with a photographer on hand? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I took a deep, calming breath. One that said,</span>
  <em>
    <span> I don’t have time for this shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She knew she was losing, so she began to throw out ideas in hopes I would find one appealing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your mom? I could work for her?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What about an assistant? I can answer phones.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could clean! I’ll clean your house.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Honestly, I just wanted her to shut the hell up because I already had a headache as it was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll figure it out,” I finally grunted before standing and leaving her behind. I was done with the conversation and I was heading downstairs whether she wanted to follow me or not, and I didn’t look back to see if she was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe if she sat upstairs long enough she could come up with a better reason as to why I shouldn’t send her back to daddy dearest because “taking pictures” wasn’t high on my list for why I took in strays.</span>
</p><p>-*-</p><p>
  <span>I found my mother running around frantically and I knew she was about to have an anxiety attack over the preparations for the wedding reception. She did this every time she hosted a party, which always led me to asking her why she even threw parties? But she’d laugh and act like </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>was the crazy person for even suggesting such a thing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh Logan, sweetie!” She smiled. “Can you find your father? He’s off somewhere dealing with a staffing situation!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>By dealing, I assumed it meant he was fucking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was a great husband like that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t want to find my dad, but I could never learn to say no to my mother so I simply nodded and left her to shout at the poor maids. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My father, surprisingly, was actually dealing with a staff member when I arrived at my office. He had a man in a white dress shirt sitting across from him looking very nervous. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Logan,” Aaron (I refused to call my father by anything but his name because fuck him) smiled. “I was just teaching this young man a lesson.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I internally cringed because I had often been a recipient to my father’s “lessons” as he called them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What did he do?” I asked lazily. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I found him stealing food. He was putting it in the trunk of his car—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My family!” the man exclaimed. “I was only trying to feed my family!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Logan?” my father addressed me, ignoring the rambling man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm?” was my half-assed response. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do we do to men who steal from us?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Make them disappear?” I questioned helpfully. Okay, so it wasn’t the least bit helpful and it was a whole lot sarcastic, but my father enjoyed my enthusiasm for hurting people so he laughed lightly at my response. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I rounded the desk and leaned against my bookcase— just slightly behind where he sat. I watched as the man’s face paled. He opened and closed his mouth like a fish as he tried to come up with, what I was sure, was more excuses as to why he had been caught stealing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Personally, I didn’t care about what the man had done. If he wanted to sneak away a couple of ribeye steaks, who was I to stop him? But my father liked hurting people and jumped on any chance he could get to do so without raising too many eyebrows. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We could make him disappear…” my father said as though he were actually considering my ludicrous suggestion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do whatever you need to do with him, but make it quick” I told Aaron, “Mom needs you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jared,” my father said and the man lifted his nervous gaze to meet mine before it slid back to my dad. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes sir?” he asked with a lot more gusto than I thought he would have left in him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please get out of my sight before I decide to really teach you a lesson. And if I ever catch you in my home again, I will personally see that you endure a more… </span>
  <em>
    <span>serious </span>
  </em>
  <span>consequence.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t correct Aaron when he called it his home. It was no use, he still thought he controlled everything I did and had. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes sir,” the man, Jared, told Aaron seriously as he nodded emphatically. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jared?” I asked. The man looked back at me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why exactly are you still sitting here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked down at the arm rests of the chair as if to realize for the first time he was still sitting. He jumped up and ran out of the room without a goodbye or a single look back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Aaron chuckled darkly before twisting to look at me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom needs me?” he asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yep,” I told him, popping the p as I did. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great,” Aaron mumbled. Together we made our way out of my office and to the backyard where the reception was to take place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, you’re a married man,” Aaron laughed. Laughing at the idea of me being married made me want to punch him more than usual— especially considering the circumstance. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” I replied through gritted teeth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hopefully Lilly can put up with your dumbass ways,” he sighed as if I were a huge burden he had always had to carry. And if you had to ask him, he would probably tell you I was. But he was the real burden in the relationship— considering one liked to beat the other, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>wasn’t the one who collected belts in my closet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As it happens, Lilly wasn’t available today so I married her sister instead,” I told him as if it had been my plan all along. I didn’t want him thinking that Jake Kane had pulled one over on me. I was always the man with a plan. One step ahead of everyone else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everyone but Jake Kane, it appeared. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That had Aaron roaring with laughter. He hit me across the back affectionately— the kind of thing a normal father did when their son said things like, “Dad, I made Forbes list of young billionaires.” But my dad wasn’t a normal dad. He was a Castle dad, and Castle men approved of whatever was dark, conniving, and manipulative. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re going to have to tell me that story,” Aaron said as he continued to laugh. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t find any of this particularly funny, but I let him have his moment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not much to tell. Lilly wasn’t available to be married, but her sister was a Chosen woman. I struck a deal with Jake and here we are.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What did he get in exchange for his virgin bride?” dad asked. He sounded skeptical of my story, which wasn’t that surprising considering all I had talked about for the past month was about marrying </span>
  <em>
    <span>Lilly </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kane… </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>Veronica Kane.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s between me and him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I could feel dad’s eyes burning a hole in the side of my face, but we arrived at our destination just in time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I knew he wouldn’t just let me get away with not telling him what the deal between Jake and I was, but it bought me enough time to come up with a lie to tell him. I was not about to tell anyone what my agreement with Jake Kane was, least of all Aaron Echolls. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Aaron. My love,” mok smiled, “can you please go over security details with Clearance? He is an absolute menace and won’t let me do it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was because she was a woman, and Clearance was a part of The Castle, but I didn’t think it was very useful to point that out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Castle didn’t value women or any aspect of their independence. My father married a woman who was not a part of that world, so Mom had a hard time coming to terms with the way she was treated by Castle men. And considering what a piece of shit my dad was, he actually gave her a lot of freedom. Much more than The Castle wives were usually given. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which is where I came in. I was somewhere between the normal world and the crazy place my father came from. I wasn’t quite a part of The Castle, but because my father was a prominent member, I was given certain </span>
  <em>
    <span>liberties</span>
  </em>
  <span> while still maintaining my autonomy. But I had thrown that all away when I had asked Lilly to marry me. When I made a contract with Jake Kane, I had signed my soul to The Castle. Little did I know I was signing my freedom away for a shy, scrawny blonde woman who was not, in fact, Lilly Kane. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I scrubbed my hands down my face which alerted my mom to my distress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What mom?” I asked her knowing full well she wouldn’t pry unless prompted. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What happened? Where’s Lilly?” she asked me in a hushed tone. I didn’t think any of the working men or women scrambling around even knew who Lilly or Veronica was, but it was better to be safe than sorry. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jake lied,” I whispered back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A small gasp came from my mom and she gave me such an annoying look of pity I wanted to punch something. People in my world did </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>pity me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not a big deal. I’ll make it work…” She nodded sympathetically, so I added for good measure, “that or I’ll kill the man. Either way I’ll win.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyes went wide. She knew just mentioning killing the president of The Castle could lead to my “disappearance” but honestly I was so pissed at the world, I didn’t really care if they tried to take me. If I died I knew I would at least be able to take a few of Jake’s men with me while on my way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just… don’t say anything. I plan to make this seem like it was my plan all along. Dad thinks I switched Lilly for Veronica on purpose.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>We both moved our attention to my father who was talking to the head of security. They seemed to be in a deep, serious discussion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ll need to do a better job at hiding your emotion, sweetheart. I knew you were upset…” I flinched at the word upset. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Angry,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” she amended, “from the moment you arrived. And if the way Veronica looked was any indication, she’s terrified of you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I let out a frustrated sigh. My mom was right. I was way too tense to have just been married according to plan. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll try to loosen up,” I promised. “Where’s the bar located? Maybe some Jack will help—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Logan Echolls!” my mom reprimanded me, “There won’t be any </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jack Daniels</span>
  </em>
  <span> at this event! This isn’t the PCH.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I resisted rolling my eyes at her theatrics.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine, but point me to the bar. I need a drink… or two.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Or twenty</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I thought grumpily.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She giggled and pointed her skinny, clawed finger toward the left of the yard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I saluted her and sauntered in the direction she’d pointed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My yard was not quite what the average person would call “a yard.” It was the size of a highschool football stadium with a giant pool and pool house in the furthest part of the land. I lived near the beach and the house was surrounded by palm trees to ensure privacy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As I rounded the corner, I found a large bar set up with a bartender already making drinks for a few familiar faces. Another member of The Castle, Gorya Sorokin was tossing a bill at the bartender as he lifted his glass to his lips. Gorya was my age and a royal pain in my ass. The dude was a complete douche, but was the epitome of a Castle man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Seeing him standing there, I was reluctant to head to the bar, but I needed a drink and no asswipe was standing in the way of my Old Fashioned at my own damn wedding reception. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gorya lifted his glass to me in a toast as I neared. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey! You’re a married man!” he exclaimed. He was already obviously drunk. Drunk Gorya was worse than sober. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mmm,” I responded noncommittally. I gave my attention to the bartender and told him my order. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t believe you got Jake to agree to give you his daughter,” Gorya continued without getting the hint that I didn’t want to talk. “And the virgin one at that. Fuck, dude. Good for you. I would have paid handsomely to tap that ass.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Though I wasn’t Veronica’s number one fan, I didn’t like the way he spoke about Veronica as if she were a hole to fill. She was truly innocent and clean compared to the rest of us, and something about the crudeness of his words really pissed me off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Clenching my fists I turned to Gorya slowly. His stupid ass smile slipped slightly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t talk about my wife that way,” I told him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on, dude,” he insisted. “It’s not like you married her because you actually like her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t give a fuck why I married her. Don’t talk about my wife that way, you prick.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That shut him up. He raised his arms in surrender and moved away from the bar shaking his head as he went. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The bartender slid my drink toward me and he gave me a small smirk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That guy a friend of yours?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you won’t be angry if I say thank you for running him off?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I smiled, took my drink, pulled my wallet out of my pocket, and threw a hundred dollar bill in his direction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope,” I answered as he gaped at the bill. Clearly the guy wasn’t used to getting tipped well. That furthered my pissed off mood. With doing gigs like this, large tips shouldn’t be foreign to him. Yet here he was staring at the one hundred dollars like he’d never seen Benjamin Franklin’s ugly fucking face before. The Castle folks were true assholes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I tipped my glass in his direction and walked back to my mother. At some point during my bar visit, Veronica had found her way to the party. Which was unfortunate. Part of me had hoped she’d hide all night upstairs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bummer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Veronica,” I said before taking a sip of my drink. It was strong, exactly how I needed it to be if I was going to get through this thing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Logan,” she said in a small, but friendly voice. My mother took Veronica’s hand and pulled her away saying something about showing her the lay of the land or some bullshit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I gulped the drink down and placed the empty glass on a tray that was passing me by. I quickly grabbed a full drink from the tray, not caring what it was as long as it was alcohol. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taking a sip, I grimaced as the taste of tequila hit my tongue. I fucking hated tequila. But it was all I had, so I downed it in a single go. I found another passing tray and dropped the glass down with a plunk. The waiter gave me a dirty look but realized who I was and rushed away before they could get fired. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Honestly, the fact that they thought I cared enough about them and their dirty looks was laughable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I had a nice buzz from the two strong drinks so I decided to pace myself. I scoured the large area to find Veronica. I may not want to be married to her, but I didn’t want to subject her to my mother’s ramblings. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And that was how I convinced him that he just needed to put a pool in! Can you imagine? Having a house in California without a pool?” my mother was saying as I joined them. She laughed placing her small hand on her chest at the audacity of me hating the idea of a pool. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Veronica smiled and nodded. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you agree?” I asked, and I realized I really did want to know what she thought of my house. I had built it from the ground up and was very proud of it. It was my first major investment I was allowed to make as an adult. For some reason, I wanted to know if she liked it or not— even though I didn’t know why her approval mattered so much. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do I agree?” she parroted back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That it would a scandal to not have a pool in California?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” she gave my mom a hesitant look before admitting nonchalantly, “I didn’t have one growing up.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” my mom gasped. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Veronica shrugged. “My dad thought it was frivolous.” She looked me in the eye before adding, “And he was afraid a man would see me in a state of undress only my husband was allowed to see.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I almost choked with her implication. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If she thought I was going to actually sleep with her when I was still with her sister she was crazy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Was I with her sister?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wasn’t sure considering I was a married man now, but either way there was no way I’d be touching Lilly’s little sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>My mom smiled brightly, however, at the insinuation and wiggled her eyebrows at me suggestively. I rolled my eyes at her and she stopped. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Smart man,” came a booming voice behind me. It belonged to the last man I wanted imaging Veronica naked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dad, did you figure out security?” I asked, trying to change the subject.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes. It was a minor situation. Nothing you should worry about.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He clasped my shoulder and squeezed a little tighter than necessary. All these years later he still liked to remind me he could hurt me if he really wanted to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The bastard. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I followed Veronica’s eyes and knew she was staring curiously at my father’s grasp on me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wouldn’t have trusted men around you either,” my father continued, directing the conversation back to Veronica. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I watched the blush she was quickly becoming famous for spread across her face and chest. I was painfully aware that my father had probably noticed as well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her dress was low cut, and I finally let myself openly observe her. The dress was looser than it would have been if Lilly had worn it, but she looked spectacular. I couldn’t deny that. It clung to her in all the right ways. And though she didn’t fill the dress out in the way it was intended, my eyes were drawn to her breasts. They were small, and she wasn’t wearing a bra— though I knew she wouldn’t have had a way to with how low it was in the front and in the back. But I found myself wishing she would have managed to find a way to wear one because the summer breeze must have chilled her. The outline of her nipples couldn’t be ignored, and I took a second too long staring at them. When I met her eyes they were wide and embarrassed. She quickly covered herself, crossing her arms in front of her body and averted her gaze behind me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I could hear my father’s quiet laugh and I could see the way his laugh made her more uncomfortable. My mother stood, not saying a word like she always did when it came to Aaron and his inappropriate behavior. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had never laid a hand on her. She was his prized possession. But I think she was still scared of him because she’d seen first hand the violence he could inflict on another human. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah, on her fucking son… </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But I pushed the thought aside, pulled Veronica into me, and whispered, “Let’s get you a drink.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t argue when I slipped my arm around her shoulder and pulled her away from my parents, and my father was smart enough to stay the hell away from us. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I was about to apologize for my father when she blurted, “I’ve never actually had a drink before.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It shouldn’t have been a surprise. The Chosen lived a secluded and boring life before they were married. Well, to be perfectly fucking honest after they married too. But the idea that someone our age hadn’t ever tried alcohol just seemed like a foreign concept to me. I had gone to an Ivy League and even at the most prestigious colleges, parties still existed. I’d spent most of my college career drunk or high. But it was my senior year that I had met Lilly and I cleaned up my act. I didn’t party or fuck around after her. She was my drive, my purpose, my drug. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to drink,” I assured Veronica, but she just shook her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not what I meant. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>want </span>
  </em>
  <span>to try something,” she insisted. “But you’ll have to choose something for me because I don’t know what I’ll like.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s a good thing we have all night. There are hundreds of options.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I hated the way she smiled up at me like I was some hero. I hated that she was taking this moment and probably twisting it into something it wasn’t. But I was tired, pissed, and wanted to get drunk so I didn’t pull my arm away. I  let her believe whatever it was she needed to believe about that moment because soon she wouldn’t have moments like these.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Soon she would find out what kind of man I really was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And the man I was wasn’t a hero. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>GUYS! Hey! Thanks for sticking with me through the long waits and indecision. I'm hoping posts will be more consistent. This chapter is dedicated to AmyPC because she's a boss who helped me get back to writing.<br/>If you wanna follow me on Twitter you can click <a href="https://twitter.com/britdo123">here</a>. AND LOOK AT THIS <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CAtMQfMAqR1/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link">BEAUTIFUL FANART</a> Y'ALL SLAY ME EVERY DAY I CAN'T EVEN.<br/>Here is <a href="https://pin.it/56Zu0Gi">Veronica's satin dress</a> and her <a href="https://pin.it/2PCCM54">wedding dress</a><br/>I hope you all enjoyed this installment! I'll keep everyone up to date on Twitter if you want to know when the next chapter will be up!<br/>Thanks again for reading. You all rock.<br/>I'm off to bed!<br/>Britt</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. the party</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you everyone who continues to share this journey with me. I took a small break between last week and this week to be respectful of the BLM movement that is happening around the world, but especially in my country so thanks for bearing with me since the wait for an update was a little longer than I expected. </p>
<p>REMINDER: Just mind the tags. I know that some people have certain triggers, and this story isn't going to be super fluffy. It's about organized crime and women aren't exactly treated nicely. Just a fair reminder. </p>
<p>ALSO: The story is still beta-less. If anything seems extremely amiss, lemme know. I tried to read over it a few times before posting, but after a while all the words started to bleed together. </p>
<p>See the notes at the end for special images and such!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>-Logan-</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The bartender who had supplied me with an Old Fashioned nodded at us as we approached. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I see you’ve brought company,” he noted. Veronica stepped closer to the bar and held her hand out to the older man. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica Ka—” she stopped, looking at me to give an apologetic look before correcting herself, “Echolls.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was weird to hear her address herself as an Echolls— as my wife, but I didn’t get angry at her use of my last name. She wasn’t entirely wrong by using it.People thought they were attending a wedding reception for a normal wedding. Others wouldn’t know the sordid details of what went down. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The bartender’s eyebrows lifted in surprise at her outreached hand before he slipped his hand into hers and replied, “Deren Smith.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Veronica smiled warmly at him, and he turned to me as if to say, </span>
  <em>
    <span>“Who is this chick?”</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>I had to admit, it was kind of weird that she had introduced herself when most Castle people just rattled off their order and limited their conversation with bartenders as much as possible. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“This is Veronica’s first time ordering a drink,” I told him with a shrug, as if to explain her quirky social behavior. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ahh,” was his response before turning his attention to Veronica. “What kinds of flavors do you like?” He then turned to me and quickly asked, “Another Old Fashioned, Mr. Echolls?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I nodded. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not sure what you mean,” Veronica admitted finally. She looked at me and asked, “What’s an Old Fashioned?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Something you won’t like,” I assured her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That seemed to annoy her because she asked, “And why is that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Let’s stick to something more fruity.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Because I’m a woman?” she countered. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Goddamn. She could be feisty when she wanted to. It reminded me of Lilly and I quickly remembered I was supposed to hate Veronica. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just fucking order something,” I told her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If the bartender was surprised by my harsh words toward my wife, he didn’t let it show as he slid my drink to me. Veronica watched me as I took the first sip, and she held out her hand after I was done.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” I asked her already annoyed with myself for thinking watching her experience her first drink could be some fun bonding moment we shared. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to try it,” she told me matter of factly. I laughed and handed the glass to her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re not going to like—” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But before I could finish my sentence she lifted the glass to her lips and finished the drink in one go. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When she placed the glass on the bar, she didn’t even flinch. She was stone cold and looked very proud of herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not going to… what now?” she asked, holding her hand to her ear as if she were waiting for a response. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I ignored her and looked at Deren. It was a silent request for more alcohol and he understood it immediately. He gave a hearty laugh and turned to Veronica. “Now </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>is what I call badass.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She beamed at him and quietly said a thank you. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Should we try something else? I could make something for you and if you don’t like it, we’ll just keep moving down the list.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’d like that,” she told Deren. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If I hadn’t been annoyed with my situation, I was now. I didn’t want to be responsible for this girl’s first blackout. But mostly I was annoyed to have been called out. Nobody showed me up— especially not my new bride. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Deren the Bartender smiled warmly as he began discussing what he was doing and how he made drinks to a wonderfilled Veronica. He was showing off as he flipped the mixer in the air and caught it. I watched the scene as a quiet observer. The way her eyes followed as he poured the clear liquid into a martini glass.Her tentative hands reaching out and taking the drink. Her lips caressing the glass. Her throat as it bobbed as she swallowed the drink. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I watched Veronica, trying to decide if I felt more sorry for myself or for her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Don’t be a pussy,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> came my father’s voice inside my head. It liked doing that sometimes. Keeping me in line whenever I was about do something stupid— like feel for another human. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The truth of the matter was, I couldn’t feel sorry for Veronica. Though she was a pawn in the game of The Castle, I couldn’t allow this girl to become a distraction from my plan. She was in an unfortunate situation, and I was sorry that she would end up paying for the sins of The Castle, but I couldn’t let her soft smile and kind eyes be a reason to ignore what </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> needed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“D’ya like it?” Deren asked Veronica. He propped himself against the bar. Apparently with Veronica in front of him, I wouldn’t be able to get a drink anytime soon. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But I was a patient man. I always got what I wanted eventually. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s… good,” she told him, obviously lying. He chuckled. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hand it here, let me get another.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What was it?” she asked as she pushed the glass back to Deren. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“A Manhattan,” I informed her. They both shot glances my way, remembering I was still there. I looked at Deren then, “Try a margarita on the rocks.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Tequila?” Deren asked. “You sure?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I wanted to roll my eyes. It wasn’t as if I’d told him to feed her shots or something. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Like the good, little wife Veronica had been trained to be she assured Deren that she wanted to try one. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Before he made her a drink however, he poured me a glass of bourbon. I took it and stepped closer to Veronica so that she was an arm’s length away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Deren began his show of making Veronica another drink, but this time her attention was on me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Now what do you have?” she asked me quietly. I realized she was trying to make sure the conversation was just ours. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Buffalo Bourbon,” I responded before taking a sip. I swirled the liquid in my mouth, relishing in the taste. I swallowed and watched Veronica’s eyes search my face. I didn’t like being under any kind of scrutiny so I decided to strike up a conversation instead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So are you planning on getting drunk like I am?” I asked her. Even I was keenly aware that a tone of distaste had tinged my voice unintentionally. But why should I even be apologetic about it? I had woken up today thinking I’d be marrying the love of my life, but instead found myself babysitting her little sister. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know…” her voice trailed off and she looked behind me at something. I turned and found Gorya had returned to the bar. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Fucking Christ. I didn’t have time for this. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Logan, my man. You need to introduce me to this beautiful woman,” he smiled as if we hadn’t just had a conversation earlier. I didn’t respond. Instead I edged closer to Veronica and pulled her into my arms. She stiffened slightly, but didn’t pull away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Gorya stood there like an idiot before Veronica finally introduced herself. But she didn’t reach her hand or move away from me. She stayed right where she was, and for once I was happy she was so compliant. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was just telling Logan how lucky he was to snag you,” Gorya continued. He nodded to Deren as if that was enough to get him a drink. Deren slid Veronica’s margarita toward her. Apparently the bartender wasn’t as petty as I would have been because he silently began making a drink for Gorya. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you,” Veronica said, grabbing her drink. I wasn’t sure if she was talking to Deren or Gorya, but by the way she didn’t meet Gorya’s stare, I had a feeling she was trying to ignore him. As soon as the drink was in her hand, I could feel her shift closer to me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Logan?” she asked. I turned my glare away from the prick standing in front of us and gave Veronica a side look. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Didn’t we need to go get that thing from upstairs? For your mom?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I didn’t expect my new wife to be so sneaky, but I smiled. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re right, babe. Let’s go get it.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She took a sip of her drink and shuddered. She gave Deren a thumbs down and placed it back onto the bar. Veronica turned back to Gorya. The smile that she plastered on her face was both fake and slightly condescending. I could help but snicker. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It was </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>nice to meet you,” she told him. The sarcasm dripping in her voice was laughable.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Together we left him to his drink and headed toward the open doors that led inside of my house. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We don’t have to go upstairs,” she informed me. “I was just trying to get away from—”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I cut her off, grabbing her hand and hauling her toward the stairs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think we should take a breather,” I finally said after a moment of hesitation. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There would be a lot of men like Gorya attending the reception. I wanted to prepare her for the bloodbath that was to ensue. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When we finally reached my room, I pushed the door open and she followed me inside. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica.” She looked up at me and waited for me to continue. “Gorya is a fucking asshole. But he won’t be the only one to attend the party.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She nodded and plopped down on my bed. She didn’t say a word so I kept going. “If you stick by my side, I can guide us through it. People are going to want to know how we ended up together. Everyone is speculating on what kind of deal I would have had to make with your father…” I stopped, my breath hitching as she pulled her long, blonde hair to one side— the milky white skin of her neck exposed. In that moment, she looked like a goddess. Like the virgin Kore waiting to be pulled into the Underworld. But I wouldn’t be the Hades to her Persephone no matter what she looked like. And by the way she furrowed her brow at me, she was completely unaware as to how beautiful she really was. I cleared my throat. “Do you know how The Castle marriages are decided?” I asked. I wasn’t sure how much Jake Kane told his daughter, so I thought I would find out now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Veronica shrugged, “I know there’s always a reason behind the marriage arrangements. I’m guessing you had something my father wanted in exchange for…” She didn’t finish her sentence, and it was obvious both of us thought of Lilly at the same time. “I don’t know what exactly you gave him,” she admitted. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And I won’t tell you... So don’t ask me.” She nodded dutifully which pissed me off. “I mean it, Veronica. Don’t ask me. I won’t tell you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay! Jesus,” she cursed. My eyes widened a little at her language. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you know how much you were worth?” I asked her. She scowled at that. I knew it was an insensitive question— to refer to her as if she was an item to buy. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But she was.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To The Castle, at least. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No,” was her clipped response. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“A lot,” I replied. “I always thought they were talking about Lilly whenever they talked about Jake’s daughter. People said that his daughter was untouchable, and no matter how much money or things people tried giving Jake in exchange for her, he wouldn’t part with her. I always thought it was because Lilly was a Delilah,” I paused, hating the term Delilah. It was a disgusting thing The Castle did to women, but I decided those women— women like Lilly— had a much worse deal in the scheme of life. “It turns out it was you I was always hearing about.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They never mentioned my name?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No… I suspect it was a way to keep you safe. Jake is the most powerful man in America— hell, the world. You would have been too important to risk like that.” That seemed to surprise her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I went to parties… Why would they have let me go to parties?” she wondered aloud. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m guessing the parties always consisted of the same people?” I suggested. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I guess you’re right. I just always thought I knew a lot more about the world… I thought I was more free than I was.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was painful to watch her realize she’d been a prisoner her entire life. The realization that she had lived in a beautifully decorated cage. That’s the thing about cages though, they can be big or small— they can be ugly or they can be alluring, but you’re still not free. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I had the sudden urge to give this girl some sort of comfort. But I waited a minute too long and lost my chance. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Veronica squared her shoulders and licked her lips before looking at me. “So tell me about the guests.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-*-</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Veronica-</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Logan had given me as much detail as he could think of in regard to the guests we’d be encountering. But I noticed how he only mentioned the men— never the women. It was a testament to the world we lived in. I had questioned Logan about the wives, but he just shook his head and told me not to worry about them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>We had been at the reception for two hours, smiling, greeting, moving from person to person. My face hurt from the fake smile I had plastered onto my face. My feet hurt from the high heeled shoes I wasn’t used to wearing. My heart hurt from the entire day I’d had. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Logan pulled me along to a new couple. This time it was an old man and a very young woman. The girl was probably my age while, if I had to guess, the man was at least in his fifties. His hair was gray and he had small, round glasses placed on the tip of his nose. The girl on the other hand, was dressed immaculately. She had a long, green gown on. It was sleek and showed off her curves. Her hair was straight and dirty blonde. But it was her eyes that made my stomach churn. They watched me with curiosity as we neared them, but the curiosity soon turned to animosity as soon as we stopped in front of them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mr. and Mrs. White, this is Veronica,” Logan nodded in my direction. I offered a small smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica?” the girl asked. Her voice was thick and sugary. The kind that made your stomach hurt— overindulgent and excessive. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mmm,” was all Logan said in reply. He turned the man and began speaking in a low voice about business. I tuned him out and looked around me. Guests were happily chatting and drinking. They all seemed to be having a much better time than the bride and groom. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why don’t we go get a drink, Veronica?” the girl asked me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I followed her to the bar where Deren was talking to a couple of guests as he shook whatever it was that he was making. His eyes met mine for the briefest second but returned to his guests as he continued talking with them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once they had their drinks, they said their goodbyes, leaving the girl and I. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’ll have two glasses of Merlot, please,” she ordered for us. Deren eyed me warily, but didn’t argue.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So Ver—” the girl began.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t catch your name,” I cut her off. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She gave me a catlike smile before  answering, “Madison.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The name didn’t have any bearing on me. I had no idea who she was, yet the way she said her name made me wonder if she’d thought I would know her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s nice to meet you,” I told her just as it was expected of me. I really didn’t care about any of the people I was meeting at the party, but I was taught to be polite. Polite I would be. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She made a noncommittal noise and reached for the wine glass that Deren handed her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I watched as she sipped and tilted her head in the direction of the second glass. I took it and copied her by sipping from it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The taste was bitter on my tongue, and I immediately flinched. I didn’t mean to show how inexperienced I was, especially not to the woman standing in front of me. I had hoped she’d missed my reaction, but luck wasn’t on my side. Her snide smile indicated she’d witnessed it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t like Merlot, Veronica?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh,” I looked down into the glass. The liquid was a dark red, like blood. The scent was woodsy and fruity. It smelled better than it had tasted. “I don’t normally drink,” I admitted. I thought it was better to be direct with Madison. She wasn’t allowed to have any power over me. Making me feel inexperienced— that wasn’t something I was going to let her have. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, sweetie,” she gushed. She took another gulp. “You should have said so. You are twenty-one right? Are you legal?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was then that I realized that she was the kind of person who liked to make people feel inferior. Every word that had come from her mouth and every look she had given me was intentional. I made a note to avoid her at all costs from this point on. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I may have been naive, but I wasn’t stupid. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not that it’s any of your business,” I smiled, “But I am definitely legal. I’ve just found I like to stay in control of my senses.” I leaned forward and whispered, “Some people say it heightens your experience, but…” I trailed off and turned my head in Logan’s direction. I continued in my whisper, “Logan is quite the skilled partner. You’d be an idiot to not go into the bedroom with a clear mind.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I don’t know what possessed me to say it, but Madison looked absolutely livid.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You stupid whore,” she muttered under her breath. “He hasn’t fucked you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hasn’t he?” I responded mildly. I picked up my glass of Merlot from the bar counter. “Thanks, Deren.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He whistled as I left Madison behind me. I beelined for my husband. My words rang through my head as I neared. What had I been thinking? To imply I had a sexual relationship with Logan like that to a complete stranger?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>He is your husband</span>
  </em>
  <span>, a voice reasoned inside my head. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s not entirely weird for someone to think you’ve slept with him.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If people hadn’t thought I’d already slept with him, they would definitely believe I had after tonight. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>My cheeks were on fire with the thought of what happens on a wedding night. I wished I had tried to leave instead of heading back to Logan. I was positive that he could see my embarrassment painted in the form of a blush on my cheeks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He pulled me into him the moment I was near enough for him to touch. His arm around me had my head spinning. Men had never touched me growing up. Heck, people in general didn’t touch me. My father was cold and my mother was absent. I wasn’t used to the touch of others. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Except Lilly. She was hugger and a cuddler. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I looked up at Logan who hadn’t stopped speaking with Madison’s husband. My stomach soured as thoughts of Lilly floated around my head as her lover held me. This was wrong. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I felt like I was drowning. His arm around me was too constricting, the dress I was wearing too tight. I needed to get away from the party… from him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I started to move away from him, but his arm became heavier, a clear indication I wasn’t supposed to leave. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Please,” I begged quietly. He had heard me, his body tensing slightly, but he didn’t let go. His conversation continued effortlessly with the old man. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I needed him to let me go. I could hear my pulse thudding in my ears and my breaths were short. Was I having a heart attack? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica, dear, are you okay?” Mr. White asked me, the look of genuine concern etched into his wrinkled brow. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was then that Logan finally turned his attention to me. He must have seen the same thing Mr. White saw because he finally pulled his arm off of me and let me back away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry.” My voice was as weak as I felt. “Excuse me.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I rushed away, back into the house and away from the dull sound of the guests talking. Away from the light jazz music that added to the chaos of the environment around me. Away from my sister’s love— my husband. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It wasn’t until I reached his room that I felt like I could breathe. I tried to push the door open, but it was locked. Frustrated, I kicked the door. I felt a rush of something— something that felt good— so I kicked it again. And again, until I realized tears had begun streaming down my face. I slid to the floor and let the sobs take over my body. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I was tired of hiding how I felt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I knew who was standing above me. His voice was already something that would be etched into my soul for the rest of my life. Even if he sent me away, I would never forget the sound of his voice. The soft timber of it when it said my name. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He unlocked the door and pushed it open. He didn’t move. I didn’t move. Instead I kept crying, refusing to be hidden behind closed doors for the sake of appearance. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I could sense he was agitated, but I didn’t care. The sound of shifting had me peak an eye open. He was kneeling beside me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you stay out here, someone will hear you. And while I don’t give a fuck what those people think, I know that you do. Please.” The word please seemed to pain him to say. “Get in the room.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I sniffled and complied. Not because I owed him anything or because I was being an obedient wife, but because while I hated it, he was right. I did care what those people thought of me. I was worried news about my poor behavior would make it back to The Castle. If they thought Logan couldn’t handle his wife, they may teach him a lesson. I didn’t want anymore trouble than I had already caused. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Together we entered the room and he closed the door behind us. It was the third time I’d entered his room, and each time I felt as though I was intruding. And I suppose I was in a way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We aren’t going back to the party. At this point people would have expected us to run away anyway.” I didn’t respond, and he must have thought that meant I didn’t understand what he was insinuating so he explained, “Because they think I’ll be fucking you.” I shuddered and closed my eyes as I sat on his couch. “I won’t touch you, Veronica,” he promised. I just wanted him to shut up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know,” I told him as tears began again. “I know.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He had told me enough times in different ways that he didn’t want me. I was painfully aware I was not the wife my husband wanted. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He didn’t speak again. He must have sensed I needed him to give me space. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The severity of our situation crashed into me. I needed to contact my sister. I needed to know that she was okay. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lilly,” I finally gasped. Logan regarded me with a weird look I couldn’t decipher. “Have you heard from her?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No… I tried calling and texting, but she hasn’t responded.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Try again,” I practically begged. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His eyes roamed my face for the briefest moment. Licking his lips he nodded and pulled out a cellphone. He tapped something into it and pressed the phone to his ear. We both waited, me holding my breath and him staring at the ground. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lil?” His voice was frantic and my heart jumped. She’d answered. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Baby,” he continued. “Slow down… no…” He paused as my sister’s muffled voice echoed through the quiet room. I couldn’t make out what she was saying. His eyes met mine, wide and angry. “Repeat that?” The excitement his voice had once carried had turned cold and clipped. A chill ran through me as he continued to listen to Lilly, his eyes burning a hole in the ground. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No!” he shouted. “No! I’m not okay. Fucking dammit, Lilly!” I jumped back at his outburst. But I wasn’t a concern of his. I was pretty sure he’d forgotten I’d even existed in that moment. Logan continued to shout into the phone, expletives leaving his mouth every other word. I backed away as fast as I could. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I’d known he was probably a bad man— though Lilly had never confirmed what exactly he did. But I had never been so scared of anyone until that moment. He was fuming, pacing and cursing. He looked like he could kill someone, and I refused to be that someone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The back of my legs hit the back of his bed, making a slight sound that caused Logan to shoot a glare my way. I gulped. His eyes were shining with fury. A fury I’d never seen in someone before. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah,” he said to Lilly. His voice was eerily calm— too calm. “I’ll take care of her.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I snapped out of my fear, realizing he was about to hang up on my sister. My need to talk to her overrode my senses. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to talk to her!” I demanded, surprising myself and Logan. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She wants to talk to you,” Logan informed my sister. I ran to where he stood and held my hand out. He shoved the phone into my hand. “You have one minute,” he told me, a threat in his voice. I nodded and pulled the phone away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lilly?” I whispered into the phone. Silence followed. “Lilly?” I tried again. It was then that I heard the faint sound of a sob. She was crying. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica,” came her broken voice. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m so sorry,” I blurted through tears. “It’s all my fault. I didn’t mean—”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, Veronica listen to me. We don’t have a lot of time. Dad is going to contact you. Don’t tell Logan anything. We can’t trust him. Promise me, Veronica. Promise me you won’t trust him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She wasn’t making any sense. Logan had been her lifeline for years. Why was she saying these things?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica. You cannot trust him. He’s not who you think he is. I don’t know why dad put you in danger like this, but you have to be careful. Promise me you won’t believe anything he tells you. He’s going to try to manipulate you the way he did with me. Don’t tr—”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The phone was pulled out of my hand before I could hear the rest of what she had to say. Logan hung up and flung the phone onto the gound. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What did your sister say, Veronica?” he asked me. Ice ran through my veins.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just that she wasn’t mad at me,” I lied. “Why is she letting this happen?” I asked him, hoping he would tell me what she’d told him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His jaw clenched as he observed me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t you know?” he asked me. I didn’t say a word. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Neither of us made a move both watching the other for signs of dishonesty. He shook his head in disgust after a few minutes of my silence and pushed past me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m getting drunk, Veronica, but feel free to stay in here all night. I won’t be coming back.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What about the guests? They’ll think—”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t give a </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck </span>
  </em>
  <span>what anyone think, Veronica. And quite frankly, I don’t care about sparing your reputation.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Any hope I had found during the night vanished as he made his way to the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What did she say?” I demanded from him, making sure my voice didn’t falter. I didn’t want him to think he had scared me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His hand stopped on the door handle. For a moment I thought maybe he’d stay. But he proved me wrong by pulling the door open violently. He turned to me, his words sealing our fate. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She doesn’t love me.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And with that he slammed the door shut behind him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Leaving me in the monster’s lair, alone. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Logan-</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I was deliriously drunk by the time I stumbled back to my room. I hadn’t gone back to the party. Instead I had found myself in my library drinking an entire bottle of whiskey alone. I was too angry to be around those fucks that my mom had invited. Someone would have ended up dead if I went back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And to be honest, I already had a big enough mess to clean up— and blood was a bitch to clean out of grass. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I laughed darkly at the memory of the last time I had to clean someone’s guts off my lawn. Some bastard that had double crossed me and my father that I was given the job of taking care of. I couldn’t even remember his name or the details. After about the tenth man I’d killed, things began to blur together. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I stumbled in the darkness of my room toward my bed. I didn’t even attempt to take my shoes off as I dropped and sighed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The soft grunt beside me sobered me instantly. I had almost drunk the memory of my new wife out my mind. But her small body was curled into a ball on my side of the bed and I had dropped partially on top of her. She lifted her head off of the pillow. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Logan?” she croaked sleepily. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Go to sleep,” I mumbled. I shifted off of her and made my way to the other side of the bed. The side I didn’t normally sleep on. I was frustrated. I should have forced her to move. Why hadn’t I put her in one of the guest rooms? This was my fucking room for christsake. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But I was too drunk and too tired to push her pretty ass out of my bed so I kicked my shoes off and pushed my dress pants down and off. I slept in boxers. Some strange girl in my bed wasn’t going to change that. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Fuck, why did I keep thinking of her as pretty? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I turned my head so I could get a better look at her. The room was too dark to make out any details, but I could see her curves in the moonlight. She wasn’t terrible to look at, I conceded. I laughed a drunk man’s laugh which had Veronica stirring. I covered my mouth with my hand, trying to muffle my laughter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nothing about this situation was funny, but I was past the point of anger and promptly fallen into the state of insanity. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Fuck Jake Kane and fuck both his daughters. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And while we were at it, fuck my dad for pulling me into Castle business when I could have easily stayed away from the organziation. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When I was growing up my father hadn’t been around much, My mother raised me primarily alone. He hadn’t come back into the picture until I was about fourteen. He’d told me and my mother it was time I learned how to be a man. By “being a man” he had meant setting me up with a hooker and having me witness him killing a man in the span of a week. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I had always wanted to run my own book publishing company. I snorted at that and then stilled, remembering the sleeping beauty beside me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After my week of “being a man” with Aaron, I had no thoughts of book publishing ever again. That week changed me. I knew I wouldn’t ever have a normal life after that. Instead, I finished high school and had joined my father in his shady ass business. He had been a movie star in his earlier days. But when he came to The Castle for money to pay off a gambling debt, he’d found himself pulled into their world. He got involved in their business as a way to pay for his debt. He was in charge of the drug ring on the West Coast. A boss in his own right, he'd taken me under his wing with Jake’s consent. Nobody shared Castle secrets without the president’s consent. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But Jake had never forced me to take a vow for The Castle. I was never explicitly part of The Castle— always straddling the line between a normal life and the life of a criminal. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But that all changed the moment I signed the contract between me and Jake Kane. The girl beside me had sealed my fate. I was firmly over the line now. I was a member of a group I hated. A group I swore I’d destroy. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A group I was still going to destroy if my plan worked. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I dragged my hands down my face, I felt sluggish from the alcohol that was coursing through my veins. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I closed my eyes hoping I would get to sleep sooner rather than later. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lilly’s words wouldn’t shut up as they bounced around his mind, taunting him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m sorry. It wasn’t real. None of it was real,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>she’d told me. I didn’t believe her. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>couldn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>believe her. My entire life I had made sure to never get too close to anyone. Never close enough for someone to have any power over me. The moment I had realized I loved Lilly, I had put all my trust in her. I went against everything I stood for to trust her and love her and let her know me.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Did she ever really know you though?</span>
  </em>
  <span> a voice mocked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I would be lying if I said I had let Lilly know all of me. I had let her see the pretty parts of my life. The ugly monster that I could be had been kept hidden. I was worried after everything she’d witnessed in her twenty four years, she’d scare and leave. Lilly had always been so jumpy— looking over her shoulder as if she was waiting for her monsters to come drag her back to the hell she lived. I knew Lilly had seen horrors nobody should ever have to witness, and that her trauma was buried deep inside her. She tried to pretend like she was some badass chick, but the truth was, she was scared, little girl who had depended on me to keep her safe… or sane… maybe both.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I refused to believe that she had never loved me— or at the very least that it had all been a lie. I was the one who had held her when she silently cried at night. I had been the one that she told her dreams to. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Which led me to my next dilemma. I was worried something was wrong… that Lilly was in danger. I couldn’t protect her if she wasn’t with me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And yet… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Please watch out for Veronica? She’s not strong like us.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I didn’t have a heart to tell Lilly I wasn’t planning on keeping Veronica around long enough to watch out for her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I wasn’t a good man. I never had been a good man. I wasn’t going to babysit a girl I didn’t know, especially when she was Jake Kane’s daughter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>But Lilly was Jake Kane’s daughter too,</span>
  </em>
  <span> that annoying as fuck voice argued. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I couldn’t keep Veronica around. I didn’t know what exactly was going on, but Jake had something planned. There was a reason why I had been given Veronica in place of Lilly and there was definitely something wrong with Lilly’s claim that everything between us had been fake. I wasn’t sure what Jake’s angle was, but knowing him it wasn’t good. I couldn’t trust Veronica, even if she seemed innocent. There was no way to be sure she wasn’t in on whatever Jake was planning. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And I had my own plan to worry about. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The goal was to take Jake down from the inside. The few Castle men who were on my side were waiting for me to give them the go ahead to strike. If we could take Jake down, we could take The Castle down. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After I had settled that I would talk with Jake in the morning to arrange for Veronica to be sent back, I was finally able to quiet my racing mind, and fall into a restless sleep. </span>
</p>
<p>-*-</p>
<p>
  <span>Pounding. Too bright. Fuck. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Those were the first thoughts that crossed my groggy mind when I awoke to the sun streaming through my window the next morning. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Groaning I turned away from the light and covered my face with my arm. My chest collided with something soft and it wasn’t until I heard a small gasp that I remembered I was sharing a bed with Veronica. But my head hurt like a mother, and so I didn’t attempt to move away from her. Luckily she did us both a favor by pushing herself away from me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wordlessly, she got out of bed. I could hear the soft padding of her feet as she walked to the bathroom. Once the bathroom door clicked shut, I lifted a single eye open to glance at the clock on the nightstand beside my bed. It was only a little past six in the morning so I attempted to go back to sleep. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But much to my dismay,sleep wasn’t on the table. Just as I was about to drift off again, the sound of the shower turning on sent me in full alert. My mind went straight to the way Veronica looked in the red dress last night. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Aaand suddenly the dress was pooled at her feet in my mind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I shut that thought process down </span>
  <em>
    <span>immediately</span>
  </em>
  <span>… but my cock hadn’t gotten the memo. He was extremely aware that there was a beautiful blonde in my shower. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>My wife. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Holy fuck. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I had a </span>
  <em>
    <span>wife</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, it was too much. I needed to punch something— or someone. I didn’t actually care either way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sitting up on a groan, I slowly made my way to my closet where I threw on a pair of sweats and a tee and headed downstairs. There was a gym in my house that was located down the hall from my kitchen. The Castle had a few gyms that they ran illegal fights in, but I preferred to workout without anyone around. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A few rounds with a punching bag was enough to clear my head enough to get the day started. I walked barefoot down the hall to the kitchen where my mother was sitting at the dining table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, Logan, darling, goodmorning,” she greeted me without looking up from her book. She was a perceptive lady, my mom. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mom,” I acknowledged before opening the fridge. My home chef, Celia was given weekends off, but she always left prepped meals for us in the fridge. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Have you had anything to eat?” I asked, pulling the ingredients for an omelet out, shutting the fridge door with my foot. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not hungry, sweetie,” she told me. “But your wife might be.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I turned to find Veronica standing in the entryway watching me. I raised an eyebrow which sent a blush creeping up her neck. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’d love something to eat,” she told me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hope omelets are okay.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I grunted an okay and started on making our breakfast. Veronica stepped into the kitchen and stood near me, watching as I cooked. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I won’t poison your food,” I whispered. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I quickly side-eyed her and saw she was suppressing a smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wanted to watch. I was never allowed to cook at home.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I didn’t say anything, but stepped slightly to the side so she could get closer to the oven. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When the pan was hot, I cracked the eggs into a large bowl, whisking them. Veronica didn’t move an inch, but I could feel her eyes as she watched me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you like cheese?” I asked her. She nodded and so I pointed to the fridge. “Can you get it for me?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I wasn’t sure why I was indulging her by allowing her to help me make breakfast. I chalked it up to the fact that I didn’t want to fight. It was easier to comply with simple things like this rather than waste my energy making her life hell. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Grate it,” I demanded. She wasted no time opening cabinets to find the cheese grater. It annoyed me more than it should have, but she could have just asked me where it was at. Instead she insisted on playing this docile act around me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While Lilly may have been broken, she put on a strong face. She never let me push her around or acted like she was walking on eggshells around me. I hated that her sister was so different. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Top drawer to the right,” I finally told her after I had enough of the sound of slamming cabinets. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She quietly retrieved the grater and began her task on the counter beside me. She was close enough that I caught a whiff of her scent. It was sweet, like candy… no… </span>
  <em>
    <span>marshmallows</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Celia had already chopped all the vegetables for me, so I had nothing to keep my hands busy as Veronica grated the cheese. I took the free time I had to look at her. Her long hair was wavy, still damp from the shower she’d taken earlier that morning. She was wearing a baggy cropped shirt and a pair of blue jeans. But they weren’t jeans like most girls our age wore, tight to show off curves, but rather slightly baggy. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Mom jeans. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Not </span>
  <em>
    <span>my </span>
  </em>
  <span>mom, of course. She wouldn’t be caught dead in a pair of jeans like that. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But I couldn’t help but think it was cute on her. In a weird, dorky way. Her face was completely void of makeup. Since I had only met her the previous day, and considering I’d only seen her in a wedding dress and cocktail dress with a face painted for the occasion, I felt like this was the first time I’d ever really seen her. I imagined this was probably what she normally looked like. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But even without makeup and all the pomp and glamour of the day before, she was still beautiful in her own way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I slid my eyes down her body. Her feet were bare and her toenails were painted a light pink. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When I lifted my eyes, I found my mom examining us. I narrowed my eyes at her and she sent me a smirk. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Well, we knew where I got that little trait from. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Veronica lifted the grater to reveal a pile of cheese. “Is this enough?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Perfect.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She smiled and pushed it closer to me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you like to make the omelet yourself?” I asked her. She shook her head and stepped back. I grabbed her wrist before she could run away. “It’s not that hard. Let me show you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She conceded and let me guide her in front of the stove. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I handed her the bowl of whisked eggs and we began making our food side by side. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was weird, being domestic like that. Whenever Lilly and I had ever spent the night or weekends together, we were in hotels. We’d order room service, and Lilly laid around in bed until noon. She never had any interest in being domestic with me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Or maybe she did, and we just never got around to discussing that. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once our food was ready, we made our way to the table where Mom was still sitting, reading some self-help book that would never amount to anything because she always slid into the same self-sabotaging habits. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Like living with an abusive husband. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Veronica,” mom smiled, finally putting down the book. “What are your plans today?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing mom, thanks for asking,” I mumbled under my breath. She ignored me like she always did when I got smart with her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh…” Veronica looked between me and my mom debating what she should say, “Nothing, I suppose.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Great!” Lynn clapped her hands together excitedly, “I wanted to take you shopping.” She eyed my cooking partner and I knew she was horrified by Veronica’s outfit. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shopping?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“For clothes, honey. I want it to be my wedding present to you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I watched Veronica’s cheeks turn a deeper shade of pink as she glanced down at herself self-consciously. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You look fine,” I reassured her under my breath. I grabbed her hand under the table, but quickly pulled away, because what the fuck? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay,” she told my mom, and then began eating. Together we ate in silence as my mother rattled off the plans she had made for her and Veronica. I knew Veronica would have probably rather pull her own hair out strand by strand than shop with my mom, but I had my own problems to deal with. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There were worse people that she could spend time with than Lynn Echolls. At least she’d have a new wardrobe by the time this was over. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I made a mental list of things I needed to do that day, contacting Jake Kane being at the top of the list. I knew he’d be waiting to hear from me, and if I didn’t play by his rules— or at the very least pretend to play by his rules— he would become suspicious of me. I needed him to think I was on his side or taking him down would not be an option. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jake Kane would pay, one way or another, for his crimes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And I would be there holding the gun when he did. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I decided it would be easiest if I just let you guys have the link to my <a href="https://www.pinterest.com/brittany4824/vm-sisters-fic/"> "fall apart Pinterest</a> page. You'll find my visual inspiration there! </p>
<p>Feel free to follow me on <a href="https://twitter.com/britdo123">Twitter</a> if you'd like. I'll warn you there's not much Veronica Mars stuff on there. But I may post update info from time to time if I have enough of you guys there wanting it!</p>
<p>For those of you who don't want to dig, here is a photo of what I imagine <a href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/127297126957115253/">Logan's yard</a> to look like. </p>
<p>See y'all on the flipside!!</p>
<p>Britt</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>